Sunday, February 7, 2010

1 year of Jimi's Passing

I'm feeling increasingly more and more depressed as the days begin to dwindle to Jimi's one year of passing. The 16th will be a very difficult day for me.

I'm in school to be a vet, and once I am, I want to find that horse that gave that lethal blow, and put him down myself. I've never hated a horse so much in my life, and I just don't want him killing another little girl's dream, and breaking another little girl's heart.

Though, I guess it's just something I'll have to get over. I won't be able to find the horse, I guarantee you that, and that kind of hate just needs to be put to bed. But I can't forgive him, not yet.

I'm reading the Tao of Equus, a great book, that I began reading the summer before I bought Jimi. I wish I re-read it while having Jimi, there are so many things I could have used to better our relationship.

And I need to get back up on a horse, and soon. If I don't, I fear this depression and rage will only be pent up and grow into a mental illness, or something of the sort. Not a good thing.

Things with Mr. III are great, and will continue going great. He's awesome.

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